Prologue
Channels 7s gameday commentary is a source of constant ridicule and criticism, particularly the performance of one Brian Taylor…..
During the game between West Coast and Carlton, it was observed by many on Twitter that Daisy Pearce in particular was being ignored by Taylor, and that the commentary was worse than ever
With that in mind, we decided to keep a diary for the commentary on certain games, as a test tracker to see if the criticism was valid
The game today is the original game that started this, West Coast vs Carlton. 09/08/2020
Commentary team – Brian Taylor, Luke Darcy, Daisy Pearce, Cameron Ling and Basil Zempilas (at the ground)
Commentary taken from Foxtel replay, so excludes h/t and pre game – clock times are on “countdown” times from the broadcast.
1st Quarter
16:00 – Taylor begins the commentary, his first observation being the umpires are throwing the ball up rather than bouncing it
15:38 First throw to Luke Darcy on commentary, who chimes on how Pittonet tried to attack Naitanuis body in the first ruck contest but Naitanui stepped around it
Taylors response to Darcys ruck contest analysis is to say “it was really good”
14:46 First comment from Cameron Ling, who observes Naitanui has pushed forward to try and expose Pittonet as his direct opponent
Darcy no sells the comment and talks about the conditions, particularly how wet it is
13:08 Darcy throws to Daisy, her first contribution to the game
Daisy goes through some of the match ups, most notably Weitering taking Kennedy rather than Liam Jones
Ling backs her up saying they didn’t expect that match up and they’d keep an eye on it
Taylor completely ignores the conversation and throws to Basil Zempilas for his first contribution
Zempilas points out Cripps isn’t being hard tagged by Hurn and Kelly has space to work in
Taylor ends with “Thanks Baz”
12:18 – Andrew Gaff marks inside 50
Cameron Ling talks through the replay, noting how Darling was strong enough to break a tackle and get the kick to Gaff
Taylor immediately talks over him to make the irrelevant point West Coast are 25-6 at this venue
12:06 Taylor “can’t remember” who got a mongrel kick forward, Ling has to remind him it was Tim Kelly
11:33 Taylor chimes in he’d be happy if he was Adam Simpson because the Eagles “look sharp”
It stands out Taylor really speaks in vagaries and emotive commentary, and doesn’t use anything to back it up
11:31 A free kick to Will Setterfield
Taylor doesn’t know what it’s for from the vision and Ling points out it was for something before the vision rolled
Taylor butts in with a “yep” like he knew that, then makes a joke about how big Patrick Cripps is
10:20 Goal to Zac Fisher
Cameron Ling explains how the goal was kicked and dissects Fisher pushing forward and a holding the ball decision
Taylor ignores him to talk to Darcy about the games Fisher missed early in the season
9:51 Cameron Ling begins a monologue about how Naitanui and his ruck taps make the Carlton midfield reactive
Darcy engages and agrees
9:20 Levi Casboult doesn’t get a free kick for what looks like a push in the back, with Darcy commenting on the decision
Daisys 2nd contribution for the game is to mention to “Darce” that it looked like a two handed shove in the back from Barass
The next person to speak is Taylor continuing the commentary, meaning they completely ignored Daisys contribution, even mentioning a specific person to engage with
9:14 Cameron Ling opines on a free kick given against Casboult for a block in the ruck and this time Darcy responds with “the umpires are getting their eye in too Lingy!” while Taylor goes “yep”
8:56 For his observation, Lingy gets a replay and Darcy and Taylor agree with his observation….Darcy says “couldn’t agree with you more”
8:47 Taylor says ‘Flyin Ryan” in a funny voice
8:33 Darcy engages with Ling around Cottrell being nailed in his first game in a tackle by Ryan
Early observation – they sure throw to Ling a lot more than Daisy
7:48 Taylor throws to Zempilas for some joshing about the rain that’s coming
6:52 Mark inside 50 to Casboult
Darcy throws to Ling again, to discuss how Casboult has added “much more to his game”
6:20 Ling again, after Casboult missed his set shot badly
He asks Taylor about his theory that you need to forget a miss like that and asks about the little voice in your head
Taylor responds with basic joshing about Richo
6:13 Daisy chips in for the 3rd time in the quarter about how Carlton would be happy with their entry inside 50 and how they were able to get 20m closer to goal that time
No one replies, Darcy goes straight to talking about Nic Nat in the ruck
5:33 Sam Walsh kicks a goal for the Blues
Daisy chips in that they talked pre game about Carlton simplifying things, and how when you have a target like Casboult, kicking it long to him can bring the smalls into play
No one replies
Cameron Ling says more or less the same thing, and the segment ends with a throw to Zempilas to say Brad Sheppard was hurt in a collision with Naitanui
Ends with a “thanks Baz” from Darcy
5:09 Duggan is tackled close to goal, Darcy throws to Ling for his opinion on the holding the ball decision
5 minutes to go in the quarter, and Daisy has been thrown to and responded to only once
4:49 Cross to Zempilas (thrown to by Taylor) to point out Rothem on Casboult is a match up Carlton can exploit
3:50 Ling talks 3 more times, ending with a musing about how Tim Kelly must be enjoying playing with Nic Naitanui
Taylor ends things with a non committal “yeah”
3:35 Taylor references Lingy again after a Naitanui tap
3:03 The Sam Petrevski-Seton holding the ball decision is reviewed, after Darlings goal from the 50
Darcy and Taylor spend far more time on Plowman agreeing with the umpire than analysing the play
Ling has to point out to them the controversial nature of the decision
Daisy chimes in there’s no prior and agrees, and Ling talks over her to finish his thought that “thats frustrating a lot of footy fans BT”
1:31 Daisy points out Tim Kelly is flying, and lists his possession and stats numbers while pointing out his work rate around the ground
Darcy responds with “he’s really finding his feet as an Eagle Tim Kelly” but doesn’t mention Daisy by name in the reply
1:03 Throw to Zempilas (by Taylor) to point out Luke Shuey just had his first possession
Taylor says “thanks Baz” and acknowledges the point
0:32 Ling chimes in with an opinion on how Oscar Allen is working Pittonet over in the ruck, which is back referenced by Darcy with a “make a really good point Cameron Ling”
0:22 Darcy throws to Daisy, for a discussion on Nic Naitanuis numbers not reflecting his game
This is only the second time any commentator has specifically asked Daisy a question
Taylor still hasn’t spoken to her
0:00 Waterman misses a shot after the siren
First quarter summation, Pearce has been spoken to twice, with lots of crosses to “Lingy” and “Spot on Lingys”
2nd Quarter
16:00 Darcy opens the commentary praising the ruck work of Naitanui
15:31 Lings first contribution to the quarter is to point out the strength of Liam Jones to hold up Oscar Allen in a tackle
Taylor chips in with a “well done”
14:52 Brad Sheppard kicks a goal for the Eagles
Darcy is a little confused who kicked the goal, but throws to Daisy once he realises it was kicked by Sheppard and Daisy jokes its a good moment for the defenders when that happens
Taylor ignores this and tells Darce he thought it was Nelson that kicked the goal
Ling more or less makes the same point Daisy did about defenders being happy
14:35 Taylor makes a comment about Cottrells time trial and then a funny about his haircut….
13:59 Cross to Zempilas for an injury update on Dom Sheed – no reply from Luke Darcy
13:39 Daisy chips in that neither Liam Ryan or Josh Kennedy have had a possession and it’s a tough day for forwards
Taylor completely ignores her and jumps in to shout out Naitanuis stats in the ruck
12:34 Kennedy marks on the lead
Zempilas chimes in it’s his first touch for the game, the exact thing Daisy said 60 seconds earlier
Darcy gives him a “he’s been in great touch as well Baz”
A maddening minute….
12:14 Taylor begins an extended monologue about Tom De Koning
He starts by stating loudly he knows how to pronounce “De Koning” because he spoke to De Konings Mum
He then chimes he is one of 10 kids and lists some of the other De Koning children
This counts as “research”
This discussion goes on for around 40 seconds while the game goes on…
11:33 Taylor describes a kick after all this joshing and japing as a “fuzzy little flunker” (if you were wondering where the blog title came from)
11:23 Darcy engages in some joshing about De Koning, he, Ling and Darcy have a chuckle
11:11 Throw to Lingy for some vagaries and analysis around Carlton “working hard” and “needing more polish”
11:03 Throw to Zempilas for more discussion about the rain – Taylor joshes with him about Basil being the Lord Mayor of Perth,
More chuckling
10:09 Another throw to Ling to discuss a deliberate out of bounds
9:54 Darcy throws to Daisy this time, to discuss a free kick, and Daisy says it was there for a grab of the wrist
All the crosses to Daisy so far have been from Darcy
9:20 Taylor and Ling have one of those vague Channel 7 conversations that happen in the footy commentary where Taylor says something like “Carlton are hanging in there” and Ling says “They need reward for effort”
Kind of unquantifiable air filling nothings
8:40 Goal to Carlton kicked by Zac Fisher
Daisy points out the goal started with a big spoil that impacted the game from Liam Jones, and dissects a body spoil from Eddie Betts
Taylor completely ignores her to talk about Zac Fisher returning to the side
Still hasn’t mentioned her by name
Daisy repeats her previous comments for the broadcast
Darcy doesn’t reply, throws to Zempilas for analysis on Patrick Cripps injury
Ends with a “we’ll keep an eye on it Baz”
8:22 Darcy throws to Ling for a discussion on holding the ball
Daisy spoke twice with no response and within 20 seconds Darcy had thrown to Ling and Zempilas for discussion
7:30 Cripps takes a one handed mark
General joshing occurs about Cripps “being happy with himself”
He misses the set shot, and another throw to Zempilas for an injury update on Cripps
Taylor ends the cross with a “bit going on….medically”
6:42 Taylor calls a mark to Cunningham, who isn’t playing
6:28 A kick forward isn’t paid deliberate, Ling muses on possibly not being paid due to team-mates being in the area.
Daisy chips in with a “you’d think after the Curnow one was paid” but gets swallowed up by Darcy starting commentating again
6:15 Another cross to Zempilas for an injury update on Pittonet and Jack Martin
He also points out Matthew Kennedys tagging job on Shuey
Taylor proudly states “All over it Baz!”
5:30 Ling praises Zempilas for his injury updates on Cripps
Ling then suggests Cripps play forward and Darcy completes the circle of praise by saying Ling had a good idea pushing Cripps forward
4:26 Goal to Gibbons from a free kick
Daisy jumps in to point out that Carlton are able to get deep entries, and with only one flying, the crumbers can get to work
No one replies
Ling jumps in to dissect the free kick, Taylor puffs up after Lings comments “it’s a good game” and throws to Zempilas for an update on Jack Martin
3:55
Goal to Zac Fisher
Darcy throws to Daisy for her analysis, and Ling then comes in at the end to point out about the danger of Carltons deep entries
He doesn’t acknowledge this is what Daisy has been saying all game
Taylor then praises Darcy for pointing out this is the first game Zac Fisher has kicked multiple goals
3:10 Darcy also again throws to Zempilas for a discussion about which team in WA has the most fans
Taylor calls Zempilas “the lord mayor” and a wealth of knowledge, and Darcy says “he’s all over it”
1:51 Taylor proudly states he knows the names of Tom De Konings parents again
Ling has previously stated more vagaries about Liam Jones has been good and De Koning has been strong
Half time siren
We’re 6 quarters into our study, and Brian Taylor hasn’t thrown to or spoken to Daisy Pearce once…..
3rd Quarter
16:00 Darcy opens the 3rd quarter commentary, saying the Blues have been “unbelievable”
15:39
Goal to Zac Fisher
Darcy references Fishers challenges with injury.
Ling jumps in to mention Carlton are getting the ball long and deep, which Daisy has been saying for ages, before concluding Zac Fisher is having “a lot of fun!”
Daisy tells “Lingy” that the key was the quick entry from Cripps that caught the defence unaware
Taylor completely ignores her to point out Fisher is currently outscoring West Coast
15:05 Daisy points out that West Coast have had 18 inside 50s for 6 scoring shots and Carltons defense is holding up well
Darcy ignores her and switches to talking about Casboults mark
14:36 Lings first contribution of the quarter to continue on (unacknowledged) Daisys theme from before about deep entries, noting as West Coast clear a shallower entry easily
Darcy doesn’t comment, switching to talk about a Kennedy mark
13:10 De Koning is unlucky not to get a free kick for his tackle on Naitanui
Darcy throws to Daisy to discuss how impressive his tackle was and Daisy notes he’s been strong in moving Naitanui off the ball in ruck contests
12:28 Taylor contributes that “the rain Basil forecast hasn’t arrived”
11:30 Kennedy marks and goals
Taylor engages Lingy with his stat that Kennedy has kicked 42.15 to that end of the ground
Daisy makes a comment about Liam Jones decision to mark rather than spoil and comments on the build up to the goal
Darcy doesn’t respond, crossing to Zempilas for an update on Marc Pittonets injury
Darcy concludes with the vagaries of West Coast being a hard team to beat in Perth
11:06 Taylor chips in with the information that Cottrell and De Koning live together
10:52 Ling chips in that Carlton are down 12 in the clearances and praises their defensive work to make up for that
Taylor ignores the comment to keep calling the game
10:35 Daisy points out after a free kick is paid that Nelson was lucky to avoid being pinged for holding the ball
Darcy ignores her to mention Pittonet is back on the ground “as Basil said”
Daisy is starting to sound a little frustrated
9:37 Eddie Betts intercepts and snaps for a point
Taylor calls him a “Snappy Tom Tom Tom!”
9:20 Taylor observes Carltons short handballs have been really sharp
Ling praises him by saying “good pick up BT!”
Taylor proudly preens “his boundary umpire” is throwing the ball in
9:08 Taylor says Walsh has “a big tall brother” coming in the draft next year
8:12 Liam Jones takes a mark
Ling observes he’s happy for Jones to keep trying to take marks and go for it, even with his mistake before
Daisy says that’s why its unfair to mention his mistake from before when the reward is worth it
Taylor ignores all this to keep calling the game
7:24 Ling praises in generic terms the workrate of Cripps and Plowman for force a West Coast turnover
Daisy goes a little deeper to mention that pressure means Jones and the Carlton defenders can push up the ground more
Darcy ignores this to keep calling the game
6:31
Kennedy misses a set shot
Daisy points out Kennedy has only 6 disposals, midway through Taylor gives a “yep” and after Daisy finishes Taylor jumps into with a “rare miss there”
Still hasn’t spoken to her all game
5:29
Darcy engages his special comments team by pointing out Carlton are looking for the long entry inside 50 “that Daisy and Lingy have talked about”
Daisy jumps in to point out if Carlton kick it from where they have it now, it will be a shallow entry and easily defended
Darcy concludes the thought as a long kick goes in that “that’s what Daisy has been talking about”
After Rothem marks defensively, Ling concludes the passage by pointing out that’s what Carlton wanted but West Coast defended it well
4:57
After the ball goes out of bounds, Daisy points out how Carlton have excelled at locking the ball inside 50, noting Carlton have had 11 inside 50 tackles to 4
Taylor completely ignores her and replies with a curt “Baz”, throwing to Zempilas
Zempilas without stats simply says “Carltons pressure has been next level, can they sustain it!”
Taylor proudly says “It has indeed!”
3:38 Kennedy goals to bring it back to 7 points
Taylor vaguely observes “both teams must have watched Richmond v Port yesterday” to sum up the high intensity
No special comments on the goal, Taylor finishes with a joke about too many small forwards in the Coleman
2:50
Petrevski-Seton is called for holding the ball
Taylor says it’s the right decision, and Daisy agrees, saying Petrevski-Seton stopped and propped
Taylor again gives a gruff “yep” in the middle of her talking
Ling mumbles something and Daisy laughs “Lingys not so sure”
2:36
Taylor sums up the goal with more vague “Eagles have a run on” stuff
Ling and Daisy disagree on the holding the ball decision
Taylor lets out a big Triple M laugh and says “Oh boy! If we can’t agree how can you!”
He still hasn’t spoken to Daisy directly, I think that’s as good as it might get
2:05
West Coast win a clearance out of the middle and Kelly bursts clear to hit Darling on the chest
Ling mentions “one thing we can agree on is the West Coast ability to score”
Daisy mentions Carlton have had a problem with centre clearances all season
Taylor ignores her and says “the Shuey handball in tight!” before trailing off
1:51 Darling kicks a goal to put West Coast in front
Taylor begins a discussion with himself as to whether Carlton should go defensive
Daisy dissects the goal, saying its the 8th time this year Carlton have conceded 4 goals in a row
She throws to Lingy for a discussion about what Carlton can do to stop it
Lingy gives it a bit of vague “leaders need to stand up” stuff about Carltons midfield, and Darcy praises him with a quick “as Lingy said”
1:00 Ling gives it more “leaders need to lead” dissection of the game
0:38 Cameron kicks another goal for West Coast
Lings dissection of the goal is Carlton have become reactionary rather than pro-active
0:00 Taylor throws to the break promising to talk to Zempilas about the lack of rain
3 Quarter time
7 quarters into our commentary diary, and Taylor has not spoken to Daisy once….
He’s mentioned her by name once
He’s also promised an update on the rain
4th Quarter
16:00 Darcy starts the call of the final term, excited to see Nic Nat “prowling around” the center square
15:35 Williamson receives a handball but stops and is tackled
Taylor wonders why Williamson didn’t keep going and play on instead of waiting for the handball
Daisy points out the air in the handball meant he had to stop and wait
Taylor mutters “OK” and moves on
As I said, that’s as good as we’re gonna get today
15:15 Taylor goes into an extended monologue to himself about umpires being in a hub and doing it tough as well
15:08 Carlton kick a goal through Setterfield
Daisy praises the Carlton mids for their clearance work and Ling chips in with praise for the entry and positioning
Darcy moves on and resumes commentating
14:55 Docherty kicks along the line, Darcy mentions Docherty and Cripps as the names “Daisy and Lingy really wanted to step up”
14:30 Ling interjects to help Taylor out on a missed touched out of bounds call, Taylor bluffs through with a “yep” then moves on to praising the umpires
14:18 Taylor interjects to point out his Mum has texted him to say the rain is in Mandurah, “tell Baz”
14:00 Ling tells the viewers to watch for Naitanui at the stoppage – when Naitanui wins the tap Darce commends him with a quick “You are all over it Lingy!”
13:50 Daisy chips in with a joke to Lingy, saying “Patty Cripps has been seeing those highlights too!” in reference to Naitanui, Ling laughs, then Taylor comes over the top instantly to say “Naitanui winning taps with monotonous ease!”, killing the conversation dead
12:52 Darcy throws to Ling as West Coast chip the ball around
Ling starts to ponder about West Coast chipping the ball around, how its like possession in soccer and how its to draw Carlton defenders out
Taylor butts in “Waiting for the mouse to bite the cheese Lingy!”
Faux Channel 7 chuckling ensues
12:15 Ling completes his thoughts about West Coast chipping the ball around, saying that West Coast can be confident even if they get a stoppage, they are winning the clearances
Taylor immediately interrupts to point out “it’s great to have the fans back!”, which isn’t related to anything at that point
11:53 Goal to Sheed
Daisy calls the goal and makes mention of how chipping the ball around taxed the Carlton defence
Ling jumps in with a quick “Great call BT” (even though all Taylor really said was great work by Kennedy) and backs up Taylors comments on Kennedy, vague as they were
Darcy and Ling wrap up the segment, with no one talking to Daisy, with a chat about Dom Sheed
10:57 Ling and Taylor have banter about a deliberate out of bounds that wasn’t paid
Ling states that a smother off a handball should be paid deliberate and Taylor says in his best Triple M jokey voice “If thats what the rule says Lingy!”
It ends in banter
10:11 Some general joshing starts about the rain coming
Darcy and Taylor muse on Zempilas being lucky the rain he predicted came
Daisy joins in by saying Zempilas had “his umbrella out like a trophy”
Taylor laughs, but doesn’t reply to her
That’s as good as we’re gonna get
9:39 Zempilas updates on the rain, saying it may yet pass Optus Stadium
Taylors contribution is “it might just be a sudden shower! I loved those when I was a kid!”
8:49 Darcy has a chuckle with Zempilas about his comment “the rain was only on the left of screen”
More chuckling with the boys
8:00 Goal to Dom Sheed
Daisy muses that the West Coast midfielders had a lot of space
Ling runs with that without mentioning Daisy, talking about the poor Carlton set up and called Sheed “Mr Clutch”
Taylor ignores all of that reel off a stat about Carlton being in close games
6:45
Goal to Waterman
Zempilas chimes in with an extended take on Sheed and his average disposals
Taylor approvingly joins in, noting Sheed averages 20 per game this season and is “doing well”
6:21 Taylor makes another joke about funny haircuts
5:23 After an extended monologue on Carlton going wide instead of down the corridor, De Koning can’t hold onto a mark in the goalsquare
Darcy throws to Daisy with a comment about De Koning being a “beauty” and Daisy says whatever happens today Carlton can give De Koning a “big tick”
Taylor jumps in and mentions “he kicked 7 or 9 in a TAC Cup game” and again doesn’t acknowledge Daisy
3:23 Carlton struggle to move the ball cleanly late in the game
After a discussion about how well the West Coast are defending, Daisy tries to join on a Taylor comment by saying how professional the Eagles are
As she talks, De Koning fumbles a mark over the line and Taylor interrupts her to say he looked like “a baby giraffe”
Taylor then thanks De Konings Mum Jackie for telling us how to pronounce his name again
Ling mentions they used to go on holiday in a caravan in Torquay and how it would be rocking with all the kids
Taylor then makes a smutty joke about “yeah it be rocking! De Koning style!”
Channel 7 chuckling ensues
It’s thankfully almost time to wrap this up….
1:31 Daisy tells “BT” that she can see the Carlton players fatiguing, noting how Casboult was running on the ground early with the smalls around him, and now thats not happening
Needless to say, BT doesn’t respond
The next person to speak is Darcy, who throws to Ling for a discussion on Eagles players still to come back in the side
0:00 The game ends with Taylor musing about West Coast as a contender and Carlton losing no friends
Postscript/Conclusion
For the second game in the row, Taylor didn’t throw to Daisy once or answer of her questions and comment on anything she said
He did laugh at one of her jokes, which might be “progress”
Taylor visibly and audibly doesn’t want to talk to Daisy or use her in anyway in the box as an asset
Ling and Zempilas got far more praise from the commentators for far less insight, with Zempilas getting praise for repeating something Daisy said 60 seconds earlier
This may have been worse than the St Kilda game, because Taylor injected some of his “humor” into the broadcast about De Koning and Zempilas predicting rain
As a final thought, Taylor and Daisy did have one conversation that didn’t make the replay, heading into one of the quarters or pre game
It was about unicycles…..
Haynesplaining 